Updated: Apr 5, 2020
Black people, black people, black people...
Listen, as much as I wanted to go IN on Jonathan because of all of his lies and deceit, I’m not going to. Instead, I want to highlight the Reverend because I feel like he represents what goes on all too often in the black community.
The Reverend was a pillar in their community. He had a wife, kids, and led the congregation every Sunday. He was THE model citizen, right? WRONG. Homeboy had multiple affairs, had a child outside of his marriage, did his dirt in the streets, and come to find out, he had a secret love affair with one of the deacons in the church! Now, don’t get it twisted, there is nothing wrong with the reverend being gay, except for the fact that he had condemned his son his entire life for the exact same thing.
Hypocrisy and Judgment. That’s what the reverend represents in this story and unfortunately, this is the norm in the black community—more specifically, the black CHURCH community. Often times people of the church get so caught up in doing what’s “right” they end up forgetting that they’re human as well and that we ALL have dirt (1 John 1:8).
Can you imagine being told every week that you’re living a life that God disapproves of and because of who you are, your soul will be condemned to hell?! I don’t think people realize the damage that can come from the conviction. These repeated distressing events can actually lead to psychological trauma for some—not to mention other social consequences like substance abuse, anxiety, depression, and/or suicidal ideation. Or, like Jonathan, the judgement and condemnation become too much and people just feel like it’s easier to put up a front, which also has social consequences. Think of what it did to Asia and their child.
If you are guilty of passing judgment on someone because their sexual preferences are different from yours, you may want to seek some sort of counseling to explore what it is that is truly bothering you.
If you are currently Lie N While Black, please seek help because eventually, there will be consequences, either mental or physical, for living a life that isn’t truly yours. Although it can be extremely daunting to come to terms with who you are, especially when you’ve been indoctrinated to do the opposite, there are mental health professionals who actually specialize in the LGBTQ+ community—most of them have had to overcome a similar struggle. You owe it to yourself to live YOUR life fully and honestly. Here’s a link to get you started on your journey to freeing yourself:
Until Next Time,
Stay Hopeful, Heartbreakers