She Could Never Be Me is a love story that touches on bi-polar disorder, depression suicide and infertility. All very heavy themes, but the author did an excellent job on not making this read too heavy. There's also drama, lots of drama. And I don't know about y'all, but I love me a good messy read.
Aarika is a woman that battles with bi-polar disorder. Not only that, her soulmate, Tavi, has recently committed suicide. When depression takes over, Aarika finds herself wanting to know what Tavi went through. After waking from a near death experience, she lays eyes on the face of an angel whose name happens to be Major. "Mocha skin coated the angel above me, and it seemed to be glowing. He was in all black though, which brought out his dark tapered fade and low-cut beard. An angel in all black was an anomaly I was sure no one would believe I'd seen. He was here though, with the softest looking lip and a glimmer in his eyes I felt cause a flutter in my belly.” Because of her past issues, she isn't so forthcoming about her attraction to Major. "It’s just that between my father’s murder and Tavior’s suicide, I’m scared to love another man and lose him. If I hold off on loving you, the less I have to risk losing you. I know it sounds stupid, but that kind of pain changes you, and I don’t know how many times I can live through pain like that.”
After saving Aarika’s life, Major decides he is out of the drug game. Focusing on his family’s business and becoming a better man. Him and Aarika have a weird encounter after her suicide attempt, that gets him caught up with her stepsister, Yuliara. Even though he's hanging out with Yuliara, his eyes, and seemingly his heart, are only for Aarika. "'This is about the way she talks about everyone who cares about her stuck-up ass. This is about how she tried to bait me into who she wants me to be, like I'm not a grown ass man who does what the fuck he wants. This is about the fact that she only got my attention because she was connected to you, but the type of woman she is doesn't even come close to you,' he vented." With Major having connections to Aarika's stepsister, it further complicates any chances of them having a relationship.
I don't think I've ever hated a character as much as I hated Yuliara. "You're the most immature, jealous ass, small, brained hoe I ever met in my life. Damn! And yo' ass will still never be her!" Her mouth was reckless, her behavior was bratty. And she refused to let my homegirl Aarika be great. She solidified the saying, "it be your own people". If an author can invoke me to hate a character, that means they've done an excellent job at executing their story. Outside of Yuliara, all the characters were likeable and relatable. This was my first read by this author and definitely will not be my last. I loved everything about this book, and I was drawn in from the moment I read the first page. Now I have to check out her catalog to see what I've been missing.
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